7 spam subjects and my reply to them

Today's list come from my regular contributor Elephino. Thanks :D

1. My boyfriend's tool is too big for my mouth.
   Reply: Stop putting spanners in your mouth then.
2. I just started having sex, and my boyfriend keeps popping out when we do it.
   Reply: You're obviously not doing it very well if he keeps leaving the room
3. Can you tell me what's wrong, and how we can fix it?
   Reply: I could tell you but then you'd sell to Nigerian scammers
4. He doesn't know who is here nor care.
   Reply: Of course he doesn't care. He'd have to know who was there to be able to care who was there.
5. Increase Your Income in Only 1 HOUR Per Day
   Reply: But I want to increase my income all the time, not just for 1 hour
6. When I tried to give him oral sex, I practically choked. How do I do it without gagging? Please help!
   Reply: The most likely cause of your problem is that your boyfriend is unhygenic. I recommend daily showers or baths for him. He may protest but if you give him little treats when he's good he'll soon learn to wash on his own.
7. Thanks for being with CanadianPharmacy
   Reply: You're welcome